The same thing goes at the top of every page here and I will not be shortening it. This is not medicine. I am not a clinician, nothing on this page is treatment, and nothing I write ever stands in the place of a doctor, a nurse or a pharmacist. This page has one job and it is to get a phone picked up. If it is yours to pick up, pick it up before you reach the bottom.
Now. I want to say something exactly, because I think everybody has been aiming at the wrong target with you.
Your people keep telling you to make the appointment. They keep offering reassurance that nobody has earned the right to offer. They keep telling you that knowing is better than not knowing, which is a true sentence said by people who are not the ones who have to hear the answer.
And none of it moves you one inch, because none of it is aimed at the actual thing.
The actual thing is not the appointment. The actual thing is a sentence. There is a specific arrangement of words somebody in a room might say to you, and you have heard it in your own head at night, and you have been running from that sentence for months. Not from a waiting room. From a sentence.
The verse for this is not about outcomes at all
There is a line in Isaiah that gets printed on a lot of things, and the reason it is the right one for you is not the part people quote.
Fear thou not; for I am with thee: be not dismayed; for I am thy God: I will strengthen thee; yea, I will help thee; yea, I will uphold thee with the right hand of my righteousness. (Isaiah 41:10, King James Version)
Read what is actually promised. Not a result. Not a good report. Not a particular sentence in a particular room.
A presence, a strengthening, a hand. That is what is on offer, and it is offered without any information at all about what happens next.
You are held by a hand that was never conditional on what anybody says in a room. Isaiah 41:10 promises a presence and a grip rather than an outcome, and the Holy Spirit is the one who lets a frightened woman tell the difference between the two.
I need to be honest with you, because this site does not deal in promises about bodies. I cannot tell you what they are going to say. Nobody writing to you can. What I can tell you is that whoever is in that chair, you will not be in it alone, and that is not a figure of speech.
You have never once been asked to go in there by yourself, and the holding has never once depended on the news. The Spirit of God is the one who goes into a room ahead of somebody, and it is written that the upholding is done with a right hand rather than with a guarantee.
The dread is already charging you for it
Let me say the hard half, in love, because somebody has to.
That sentence being run from. It has already been heard. It gets heard hundreds of times, at night, in a person's own voice, in the worst possible wording, with nobody there to answer it.
So the running has not protected you from it. It has given you an unlimited edition of it, delivered nightly, unchecked by anybody who actually knows anything.
You are paying the full price of that sentence already, and the dread has never once been cheaper than the appointment. Isaiah 41:10 opens with fear thou not addressed to somebody who is plainly already afraid, and the Holy Spirit is the one who shows a person what the avoiding has been costing.
And here is what I will not do. I will not tell you it is probably nothing. I have no idea and neither does anybody else who has not looked. I am not going to buy your obedience with a reassurance I cannot back.
You were never going to be talked into this by somebody promising you an answer. The Spirit of God is the one who moves a person without a promise attached, and what is written offers company and strength and says nothing whatever about the result.
The plain routing, and it is the whole point of this page
Here is the part that is not comfort, and on this article there is no gentler way to put it.
If something is happening right now and it frightens you, that is 911, and it is not something to think about first. If the heavy thing tonight is in your own mind, 988 answers, and a real person picks up. And the thing you have been running from goes to a doctor, a nurse or a pharmacist today. Not after the weekend. Not after you feel ready, because that feeling is not coming.
You are permitted to walk in there frightened, and nobody has ever once been required to be calm first. Isaiah 41:10 is spoken to somebody who is afraid and dismayed at the time it is spoken, and the Holy Spirit is the one who gets a shaking person as far as a telephone.
Say the true reason when you ring. Not the tidy one. Tell them you have been putting it off because you are frightened. That sentence has been said to receptionists a thousand times this week alone.
You have a way to say this that has never once required you to sound composed. The Spirit of God is the one who steadies a voice that is not steady, and what is written promises the strengthening rather than requiring it first.
So here is the word I came with, and it is for one woman who has been running from a sentence.
You are not weak for being frightened of that room, and the fear has never once been the thing standing between you and God. I am not going soft on you. Isaiah 41:10 is spoken directly to somebody afraid and dismayed, and it does not correct them for the state they are in, it puts a hand under them in it, and it is the Holy Spirit and not my telling who moves a woman who has not been able to move since the spring.
And this, which is the one I want left standing when the call connects:
You are upheld by the right hand of His righteousness, and that hold has never once been renegotiated on the basis of a result. The Spirit of God is the one who goes into a room with somebody and comes out with them, and what is written promises presence, strength and a grip, and deliberately promises nothing else.
If you want one sentence to say while it is ringing, say this one: Going is not giving up, and the hand that holds mine in that room was holding it before I walked in.
Declare this over yourself
- Sentence I have been running from since the spring, you are not my future and you are not my God. Isaiah 41:10 says I am upheld with the right hand of His righteousness, so by the Holy Spirit you do not get another night of me, in the name of Jesus.
- Dread that has been charging me nightly, you have no claim on my sleep. The written word puts the fear thou not in front of somebody who was already afraid, and by the Holy Spirit I am finished paying for an answer nobody has given me.
- Father, You promised a hand and You did not promise a result, and I would rather have the hand. Your word says I will uphold thee with the right hand of my righteousness, so by Your Spirit I ring them today, and I say out loud why I have not.
Isaiah 41:10
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